A little word written
“Prison, Pain, Purpose Bondage at the mercy of pain as we bow to the infirmities that attempt to steal our purpose. The possibility of even the future, at a distance far from reach. Toxic, habitual process of thought and action. Leading to the deception of what could be potential, by our own limitation. Reminders of past and present pain, purpose constantly plaguing the very possibility of change towards the future. Imprisonment chained to the mere view through the lens of hurt. Falling pray to question the very existence that is life. In wonder and confusion towards freedom seems but a dream. Unaware of what plagues the depths of the soul, still, the shadow of darkness covers the root of all evil. To birth that is of death, creating mass production and multiplication to suffering. Even still, by choice and courage, making the change for the tomorrow that awaits in the dawn of a new light. A simple sign of hope that may arise to restore the broken and bruised. A choice moving forward that is-the departure of past. Loosening of shackles too long to count in time, creating a new. Rising to the occasion, leading towards righteousness, the hands of hope holding me. Though with no ability to see, it leads the sight of blind eyes.” ~KrizG~
While putting this material together, I saw a quote by an unknown source that I thought I would share. It goes like this…
Never be a prisoner of your past. It was just a lesson, not a life sentence. ~ Unknown ~
A little context for contrast
These words I started not long ago on my journey to healing and self-discovery. Now, anytime you are a journey anywhere meaningful, there is always some shred of what I like to call “negativity haters” that comes up to knock you down on your bottom, and say, “You are not going anywhere, now stay there!” This could be in the form actual people in your life that tear you down, or it could something even more annoying and “hater-ish” like the pain of your past. Here is the sneaky thing about the past, and why it seems to take up so much unnecessary time and energy. IT ACTUALLY HAPPENED! We cannot deny this fact in our lives, even if we wanted to. You were damaged and hurt. But since we wonderful human being have experienced the greatest discoveries throughout history, somehow that equates to us somehow “knowing everything there is to know about life”. We then take this logic and apply it to anything else we can find. Example? Trying to suppress the past so much, that we might, believe it did not happen. This type of deception only leads to a pathological sense of existence as it relates to healing in other areas of our lives. In other words, we would create a sense of repetition in “denying” so much to our true selves that we may become obsessive in avoiding the past at all cost; even acting like it didn’t happen. Almost like a failed attempt at a Field Day game of tug-of-war.
The façade exposed
Here is why this NEVER works. Our brain, as powerful as it is, does not actually forget the trauma, it just puts it in a place until we are ready to deal with it-long term or short term is up to us. In Psychology, the subconscious is the part of the brain that is not in current awareness. It is the part of our consciousness that is not being focused on and is mostly lying dormant. It is impossible to hold the entirety of our knowledge in direct focus in our minds at the same time, so we need to store memories and knowledge. Examples of your subconscious are memories, beliefs, fears, and subjective maps of reality. The thing with your unconscious mind is it is very powerful and can, without your awareness, direct the course of what you do in your life, whether we choose to except it or not. We can not just go around trying to change centuries old science, now can we? In early education, we get a glimpse of how this plays out in our early years of learning. Swiss Psychologist, Jean Piaget was the first psychologist to make a systematic study of cognitive development. In his findings, he used “Schemas” to describe how cognitive models enable us to form a mental representation to the world. In more simple terms, “Schemas” are like basic building blocks of intelligent behavior-a way of organizing knowledge, beliefs, memory, etc. We then take those schemas, and we link them to mental representations of the world and use that to understand and respond to situations throughout our experiences. In turn, we store these mental representations and apply them when needed. Sound familiar? Most of our “unused” knowledge or memories are stored in a special place in the brain. This does not equate to making it useless, as we would like to believe. That would then support that we can just run away and lie to ourselves so that we can run from the pain of our past, and never have to deal with it. Instead, what I believe is that long ago when God created you and me in the womb, he gave our brains the ability to do more than one thing at the same time. Also allowing the brain to have multiple facets to its function, and even being able to be in motion in places that are involuntary. Like the subconscious. Now, that we have had a little nerd science, now let us get to the nerd truth of God’s word. In the book of wisdom, Proverbs tells us a little something about wounds.
Proverbs 20:27, 30
27) The spirit (conscience) of man is the lamp of the Lord, searching and examining all the innermost parts of his being. 30) Blows that wound cleanse away evil, and strokes reach to the innermost parts.
Now, I am not an expert Theologian, but it sounds to me that maybe feeling pain is not such a bad thing in the long run. It sounds like feeling and processing the pain in a healthy way, might actually be the breakthrough needed to destroy the lies and the evil that seeks to trip us up and keep us in the bitterness of unforgiveness and resentment towards the world-maybe ourselves. The way I see it, we can not avoid pain, or being on the other side of someone’s free will; even if that free will seeks to or did accomplish hurting us. We also cannot avoid that our brain has a created design to functionality in the complexity of the body. We CAN, however, control our response to our pain, and our future choices for the positive despite how our much our past tries to imprison us. The lie that we believe most of our lives is, since we could not avoid the pain from happening, then somehow, we cannot control it either. We then default to acting like it did not happen and find ourselves in even more pain and turmoil along the way as we experience different season of life that may or may not be triggers to that very pain. I read a great book once about this concept and how to “switch” our thought process in benefit of healing rather than suppressing the pain away. Dr. Caroline Leaf “Switch on Your Brain”. You should consider adding this book to your collection and experiencing the science for yourself; Neuroscience to be exact. It is way more technical than my simple mind can try to explain. I will leave it to the brilliance of the experts LOL. Bottom line fam? You got to get in a steady order of what your body truly needs, not what your hearts pain wants or thinks it wants. You will only be able to do this by filling yourself with true knowledge and wisdom, rather than what your life experiences teach you; simply “surviving”. Knowledge is power, and wisdom is bliss I always say! You are loved and not what your pain says you are. You are who God says you are, a conqueror!