Inspired by wisdom quotes from the great Brene Brown: author, professor, and
podcaster most known for her work on shame and vulnerability.
“People might mock, reject, or dismiss you because your courage and resilience challenges their unwillingness to face their own insecurities. Often times, those people who harshly criticize you, may also point to the possibility of how they too, were treated harshly in their upbringing; it feels like salt in an old wound” (Brown, 2025).
When you have the courage to accept you have flaws and face them head on, or have goals/ambitions, you may have the sad truth of loosing people closest to you; or worse, those who claim to “love” you. They may call you broken, toxic, say you have changed, or that YOU are the one who needs help. This can be in any moment of short-coming, weakness, emotion, or reliance on the strength of someone else, or requiring help at any given time. It can be in a moment of mental, physical challenges that may be out of one’s control medically speaking or it could be in a time of short-coming in a relationship. These moments are taken advantage of, attacked, and used to dismiss any reflective work, growth, love, compassion, or grace you may have demonstrated in the past as if the negative out-weighed the positive in one moment.
Sadly, there are people who will always choose to point out what is missing no matter how much they have or how blessed they have been in their lives. They will also be the same people who will focus on the mistakes that people make (dismissing their own), rather than seeing the resilience it takes to get back into the fight when you get knocked down or tripped up; or even giving them any sort of credit for how far they have come in comparison to their past, no matter how many trials were conquered along the way. This eventually leads to withdrawal of approval based on performance.
It is NOT your responsibility to convince anyone how valuable you are, period! “While it is natural to want to explain yourself, to prove your worth, you DON’T HAVE TO. The right people will see your courage and admire it; they will celebrate your growth, remind you who you are on the days you forget without keeping score; they will cheer for you and remind you they love you. These people create space for your joy, ambition, and vulnerability. To find them, you have to be willing to let go of others who do not support you or belong on your journey” (Brown, 2025).
What then can we say about how we can operate in society after rejection? First thing to understand is that we cannot avoid rejection or critizism in this life no matter how good we think we are at pleasing others. What this means is that we must be willing to let go of what others expect us to be and come to an acceptance of how who we are flaws and all. I want to preface by saying this does NOT give anyone permission to feel as though they are perfect. Acceptance is NOT about perfection. It is about understanding your worth and that worth is NOT based off success or a point-system.
We should all feel it necessary through our life journey to be in the habit of self-relfection, growth, and improvement in any area of life where we may fall short. Noone is perfect (anyone who acts or claims they are is probably more insecure than you) and you need to find people that embrace their flaws and demonstrate the necessary courage to create change, rather than those who find power in tearing down others.
Acceptance is usually the first step in any process that compels us to level up, followed by intentional and strategic action plans to move in a positive direction. So then, ask yourself, where are you in your personal journey right now? Practically, it can start by celebrating your small victories and what may appear to be the minimal amount of progress rather than focusing or ruminating on the areas we believed to be great failures. Another practical way can be to practice kindness and having self-compassion despite your short-comings and giving yourself the same grace you would give someone you care about or a friend seeking advise.
This would also be a good time to mention that ALL forms of accountability are welcome on this platform. There is no shame and there is NOTHING wrong with needing counseling, therapy, support groups, medication, or ANY other forms of recovery or healing for ANY type of trauma or life-changing event. Do not ever let anyone make you feel like you are less than because you do not have all the answers, or dare I say because you are not an “earthly god” of sorts. This goes for all levels of education, specialization, accreditation, or affiliation. Counselors sometimes need therapy, doctors may need an emergency hospital visit, teachers may need someone to teach them.
Let me say this loud, clear, unashamed, and unapologetic: DO NOT LET PEOPLE IN YOUR LIFE WHO WON’T GIVE YOU A SAFE SPACE TO BE IMPERFECT. THERE IS NOTHING ATTRACTIVE ABOUT HAVING AN UGLY HEART JUST BECAUSE YOU HAVE A HOT/PRETTY BODY. Bachelor’s/Bachelorettes with Bodies or Businesses are NOT in a position to determine your worth! You are not going to succeed with people who thrive on tearing you down because they have their own trauma they refuse to deal with by pointing the finger at everyone else.
Thrive like the beautiful person you are with ALL your flaws and take practical action to be the best version of yourself. Yes, you have junk to deal with, we ALL do. Break the mold and be BOLD to stand and fight with fierce, un-moveable courage. No one can stop you except YOU! You got this baddie babes. Now go change the world, one heart at a time!
CONFESSIONS FROM THE OTHER SIDE 