There are so many processes that are present when we go through trials of life, challenges, happiness, or sadness; it does not matter in the least. Particularly, regarding the depths of my own mind, just as my soul, this remains a mystery to me, and at times, a burden. Yet, in that space, I find that from my humility, anxieties, and silent fears, I am able to unlock depths of my mind that I am unable to do when caught up in the every day routine that takes over much familiarly. If I can articulate in this space accordingly, then I can do it anywhere.
Starting with my fears: Death, Insignificance, Regret. I am faced with the inevitable cross-roads between choosing faith over fear, facts over fiction, and fervent over familiar. Some would say it means nothing and it will be fine, for others it is the defining moment where transformation has the opportunity to take place. They would even say that it inspired things that were not yet there before; particularly in the area of gratitude in even what is considered, mundane. A soul’s posture of gratitude and choosing positive perspectives can enable a sense of peace that may change our biology. But how?
Even when faced with fear, regret, or even the possibility of death, we control the narrative with one simple choice. Will we allow the worst possibilities and experiences in our lives dictate how we then live, or will we chose to live righteously until the very end because it is the right thing to do rather than the thing we do because of how we feel? Will we look at the world with resentment with the questions of “why”, or will we look at it even more loving than before? Neither way is right or wrong in this context, as both contain a powerful psychological and biological response to what our bodies feel in times of adversity. Anxiety, Panic, and other similar episodes that can last briefly or extended periods of times such as the effects of PTSD. This is pure Biology and how our bodies communicate distress. Once stress or danger is detected, naturally, our body goes into protection mode most commonly known as the “flight or flight” response.
If we took a step back and analyzed the situation as a whole, whether they are controllable or uncontrollable circumstances, when we experience stress or high-intensity situations, biologically speaking, it can trigger our psychological trauma responses; whether big or small; and vice versa. Think of it in terms of tolerance. No two people will have the same tolerance for any given substance, difficulty, stress, or trauma. No two people will ever be the same in how they handle difficult times. What may seem minimal to one person, may be extreme to another. On the opposite hand, what may appear minimal to the same person who just had an extreme situation, the same can be said in reverse. A well-known example of this is the process of grief; particularly the application of denial. Some may be in complete denial to the point of rejection, or denial to the point delusion, either way, no two people will have the same tolerance in their responses to the difficulty or stressors of life.
There is no amount of mathematical calculation that can measure how much any one person can handle difficulty. Each person is too unique to be measured. In that, however, what we can say, is that we are capable of growth, change, and continued life-time development. It is an ongoing process through our lifetime. Each moment is an opportunity to… alter our belief system. I have seized the current opportunity through struggle to lean heavily on God for the strength to keep moving forward and the courage to believe when I can’t see or feel; ; to remember who I am in spite of what I may feel in the moment; to acknowledge that time is temporary, yet, valuable; to love as if I had nothing left to lose; and to walk with joy even when I feel temporary sadness.
Today, my choice is…. PEACE. Not because I am motivated by circumstances, but rather my free will to chose the state of which I find myself daily. In spite of the chaos around me, the eye of the storm remains in my spirit as a means to find and walk in balance. My peace is not a result of freedom from difficulty, instead, the freedom that comes from the power of the choice to embrace serenity in things that are out of my control.
Even in my fear, regret, and battling with what could potentially be the face of death and acceptance in that fact, I will choose to have stillness in the noise, a firm foundation in the storm, and a quiet spirit instead of my anxious thoughts. The idea is NOT to consider fear as failure, but that, in spite of it, you can flourish. This to me is what it truly means to have freedom which brings peace. To know that in spite of our fears, insecurities, short-comings, or past traumas, we can still thrive, and that in doing so, we are enabling our biological responses that create our image of the world.
This is a systematic and complex process that exists in our minds provides us the profound ability to develop our understanding that can also come from the application from our experiences in either a positive perspective or a negative narrative. There is no scientific explanation for why “bad things happen to good people” as we have commonly heard it said, just like there is no solidified way to handle those bad things when they do happen, even for the so called “good” people who do “everything right” according to societal standards. Each person in their own capacity handles their situations by taking into consideration all processes involved starting with our mind, body and spirit, also independent to whether they to do it according to the socially acceptable definition of right and wrong or not. This can be a conscious or unconscious application.
This means that these processes may happen subconsciously in the background, or consciously at the front-end of our critical thinking. No matter what our processes are or wherever we come from, these things do not determine where we will end up; they merely serve as a guide. Where there are things that can certainly influence our perspectives, offenses, or decisions, we are ultimately responsible of our own interpretation of those experiences. There is no one calculated approach for how to navigate these challenging moments of life, yet, we can grow and learn in each one. The exception with it’s own necessary channels would be the complexities when considering those who may have neurological disabilities or mental health illnesses.
Bottom Line: For a healthy perspective to grow, adversity is a necessary part of the analytical, biological, and psychological developmental processes. Unfortunately, too many of us tend to see adversity as a means to an end, rather than seeing it for what it is; the opportunity of transformation through our choice of peace that leads to freedom. Through complex systematic process in our mind, we have ability to develop our interpretation either a positive perspective or a negative narrative. Will we chose peace? Not because we are motivated by perfect circumstances, but, will we use our free will to chose the state our of serenity?
CONFESSIONS FROM THE OTHER SIDE 